Peborit House MD Album Track

Sarah scared me with this one.. hold on to your breath, and Bible, guys, coz you just might lose grip of both of them once you heard Dear God's haunting music and lyrics.

"Dear God"
Sarah McLachlan

Dear God,
Hope you got the letter and
I pray you can make it better down here.
I don't mean a big reduction in the price of beer
But all the people that you made in your image,
See them starving on their feet
'Cause they don't get enough to eat
From God
I can't believe in you.

Dear God,
Sorry to disturb you, but
I feel that I should be heard loud and clear.
We all need a big reduction in the amount of tears
And all the people that you made in your image,
See them fighting in the street
'Cause they can't make opinions meet

About God,
I can't believe in you.

Did you make disease, and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
And the devil too?!

Dear God,
Don't know if you noticed, but...
Your name is on a lot of quotes in this book,
Us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look,
And all the people that you made in your image,
Still believing that junk is true
Well I know it ain't, and so do you

Dear God,
I can't believe in...
I don't believe in...

I won't believe in heaven and hell.
No saints, no sinners, no devil as well.
No pearly gates, no thorny crown.
You're always letting us humans down.
The wars you bring, the babes you drown.
Those lost at sea and never found,
And it's the same the whole world 'round.
The hurt I see helps to compound
That Father, Son and Holy Ghost
Is just somebody's unholy hoax
And if you're up there you'd perceive
That my heart's here upon my sleeve.
If there's one thing I don't believe in.....

It's you.....
Dear God.

Old Crimes Make Good Music

Aside from CSI Las Vegas (or Nevada), Cold Case and House M.D are the only TV series which are worth my time. The Miami and NY versions of CSI have become so serious that I couldn't watch them without a cup of coffee within my reach. My caffeinated beverage has enough more zest in it than Horatio and Mac's crime stories. Moreover, it prevents me from dozing off while listening to litanies of always well-dressed crime busters. Where's the FUN, guys? Is adding a pinch of humor or wearing Grissom's designer not good for the ratings?

Do you know that Jorja Fox (Sara) has just left Grissom's team? She recently ended her career of digging up evidences and putting bad guys behind bars. I think she was replaced by that girl who's always taking pictures. Well, moving on...

I developed love-hate syndrome for Dr. House. One time he's so admirable, at other times I just want to hit his working leg with a baseball bat. I tend to stick more to things I despise and adore at the same time than those things which seem to good to be true. Anyway, House is currently hitting on a fresh, young Intern, Thirteen, played by Olivia Wilde. 13's cute by the way.

Cold Case, on the other hand, is the only show that leaves me teary-eyed (sobs). The characters in this TV series don't talk like they know everything, and they don't introduce you to laboratory machines that you never thought exist. Let's just say that Cold Case presents life dramas, without the too sappy or cerebral lines. Every episode is composed of journeys to the past -- 1930s, 40's, 50'... you name the year, Lily Rush's team will go back to those years to show you that truth can't be buried by time. If you have the resources, watch last night's episode "Justice". One of the best so far.

If you're a real music lover, then watching Cold Case is a must for you. Why? Because the show plays beautiful music coming from different genres, and decades, depending on the victim's death year. I will be posting songs used in today and succeeding episodes. Yey! Free Music!

Secret Heart

If you've only known Feist as the musical entity who lends life to the iPod Nano commercial with its "1234", or you absolutely have no idea what I am talking about, then I assume you are at the brink of TV or tagalog pocketbooks overdose. Music world is not only inhabited by Britney, Justin, Beyonce, or your personal rockstar Gods. If your mP3 player is infested with FallOut Boy or My Chemical Romance songs, I suggest that you bring down those fences and save yourself from the clutches of pop monotonies. Listen to other people's voices, or tunes that sound as if they came from outer space. Trust me, if they can't satisfy you like the way you've done a virgin, at least they will leave you one count less of ignorance. You've tasted another flavor, and that is always a good thing.

Going back to my introduction of Feist, its melancholic "Secret Heart" is the sh*t. If "Gimme More" gives you orgasm, then you are creepy. However, if you find yourself teary-eyed after listening to this favorite song of mine from Feist, then that means we could both agree that Justin Timberlake is/was hot. Is for you, was for me. Cheers!

Secret heart

What are you made of
What are you so afraid of
Could it be
Three simple words
Or the fear of being overheard
What's wrong

Let em' in on your secret heart

Secret Heart
Why so mysterious
Why so sacred
Why so serious
Maybe you're
Just acting tough
Maybe you're just not man enough
What's wrong

Let em' in on your secret heart

This very secret
That you're trying to conceal
Is the very same one
That You're dying to reveal
Go tell him how you feel

Secret heart come out and share it
This loneliness, few can bear it
Could it have something to do with
Admitting that you just can't go through it alone?

Let em' in on your secret heart

This very secret
That you're trying to conceal
Is the very same one
That you're dying to reveal
Go tell him how you feel
This very secret heart

Go out and share it
This very secret heart

From Friendster to Driving Down Memory Lane

Combine an Internet-ready laptop with a whole lot of free time and you will get hours of Friendster profiles viewing cum stalking. At least that's the case for a typical Filipino websurfer like me. For many years, although its popularity is experiencing a decline now due to the incessant emergence of much better or less irritating other social networking sites, Friendster has served many purpose: as an e-message account (inbox), egoistic flooders sanctuary (bulletin board), self-importance booster (testimonials), design contest (profile skins customization) and a place where you can prove friend-worthiness through statistics (hello? you have 2 full accounts with 500 persons each, yeah yeah, but look, exactly the same people in both accounts, duh.)

"Have you seen (put high school acquaintance name here)'s Friendster account?" Yes. No. Depends on how much time I have and how important the person is to me. Truth is, I rarely take a peek at profiles of people I only consider as acquaintances. Well, make that thing of the past. Going through a long bumhood has taken its toll on me. Laziness has worsen, ass got fatter, and I became a social network butterfly. Even profiles of people who used to bore me in high school or I hardly knew at all received pagehits from me. After long hours of practicing voyeurism, without its sexual connotation, its only then that I realized that, wow, the changes that had taken place are so many and shockingly enormous.

Take Jan (not real name) for example. He was my classmate way back 2nd year high school and he's gay, and weird. The gay part is OK, but the weirdness is not. We really believed he was downright crazy. I even caught him looking like a druggie once in a jeepney because he had soporific eyes and wearing dirty clothes. In school, he always get bullied, and I actually believed that the occassional beating will do him good because he did things that made him a deserving target. There goes my morbid side, haha! Well, I read from his profile (propped up to the T), I read that the underdog from the past turned into a call center agent, then into a jetsetter, and finally, someone who works in an account maintenance department somewhere in North Carolina. However, I don't want to call this a success story, only a good life transition (they're not the same!), because I don't know if he's still the same obnoxious person who managed to piss off everyone before. (Note: He was a friend, never an enemy. I liked him for being hilarious, and he was a good company, now drop that suspicion that this entry is for the purpose of revenge... I am happy for him, really.)

Then there are these people who used to be big, famous, and proud for reasons unclear to me. Where are they now? Some started families (or baby factories), some became nobodies in college. Most of the geeks found refuge in the dark world of rock, where by holding a guitar and singing emo songs, they get the attention of rockstar wannabe kids and hot chicks. The hearthrobs are now incompetent parents, working wherever a high school diploma can be accepted. Well, not all of them, as some are trying nursing to escape parenthood and experience instead the promise of snow and dollars in some foreign land. Let's see, who else? The brainiacs? They are now probably disappointed in their selves or in the system. However, in a few years, they will learn how to play the game and will become part of the saddening system. The belief that they have the power to change the world and bring equality will, little by little, fade into the background as a corrupted soul will take over. When they already have the money to buy the things they want, like other people's souls, they will tag their lives as "success stories". What happened to the ordinary or average people who consider wisdom and kindness as the ultimate treasures? They are on the road to the pinnacle of true success. Only they have no idea that they're on it.


Scratch Me, Says Itch

"Okay, okay..." I replied.




Ewan Ko Sayo!

O most ingenious Theuth, the parent or inventor of an art is not always the best judge of the utility or inutility of his own inventions to the users of them. And in this instance, you who are the father of letters, from a paternal love of your own children have been led to attribute to them a quality which they cannot have; for this discovery of yours will create forgetfulness in the learners' souls, because they will not use their memories; they will trust to the external written characters and not remember of themselves. The specific which you have discovered is an aid not to memory, but to reminiscence, and you give your disciples not truth, but only the semblance of truth; they will be hearers of many things and will have learned nothing; they will appear to be omniscient and will generally know nothing; they will be tiresome company, having the show of wisdom without the reality.
- - Plato, The Phaedrus

Does this mean that Plato, if living at the present, would choose not to bring his writing to the Web? Is Plato, the Greek geek who theorized the presence of a third sex called androgyny, adherent/preserver of old school style of writing which consists of pen and paper could never be a techie? I applaud him for prophecizing a future filled with inventions that make life easy but at the same time, lessen our interest in nourishing our minds. Shortened text messages that look like a composition of an illiterate, saving birthdays and other important events in cellphones instead of simply having the memory and heart to remember them, normal people using audiobooks, subscribing to e-mail alerts so as not to forget schedules... these are some of the products of technology which both Plato and I may disapprove of. However, blog is an exemption.

The advent of blogs, for me, had been the impetus behind the revival of people's enthusiasm towards writing. The art undergone its dark age, and it struggled to find its savior. Along came the Internet. It has all the powerful tools that cost very little or nothing at all. Add open source to that and we're facing a possible digital anarchy because resources here are more likely to remain if they are given away. The Web invited us to "log" on and experience another world, an imaginary repository of every information known by humankind and probably the machinery that can lead us to the unearthing of the undisclosed. And we all know that by writing, we reveal a secret. Therefore, the web serves as the vault of people's secrets as it is home to open journals. Once accumulated, processed, and summed up, words can be reduced to a sentence revealing a simple fact. Or, if one goes against the another, the thesis + antithesis = synthesis applies.

It means we get to learn more about the generalities of life. Get to know more about people and their behaviors, learn from them or learn to deal with them in case of misaligned beliefs. But you know what's so great about our blog writing? It acts as a mirror to our souls. Ugly words reflect an ugly inside, and sometimes, great yet misused talent. It is up to you if you want to be seen as ordinary, a great person, a great writer, or both. So, for me, it doesn't matter if your thoughts were written on paper or on-line. Just write... and let me know about you.

Crazy Talk

I didn't make these up. These are my mom's (who works as nurse at the psychiatric department of a hospital) own "all in a day's work" experiences:

1) Baliw 1: What are you looking at?!
Baliw 2: Because I have Eyes to look!!

2) Baliw: If you try to touch me again I will drink my pee and play with my poo!
Mom: (Pretending not to be affected by the threat) Do whatever you want with your body, it's your body anyway.
Baliw: You know, you're right.

Thinking she outsmarted her patient, my mom left for a moment to grab a quick bite in the ward's kitchen. When she got back, she saw the same patient licking the floor like... crazy. (Ewwww!)



Let Me Whine on Wednesday


This post's supposed to be wordless, but I felt the need to explain myself for posting this photo. First off, the source. I got this from a friend's photo album in Friendster. No, he doesn't look like this in person, neither his mom nor girlfriend. I don't know where he got this but I must admit it made me laugh out loud the first time I saw it. However, the intention was not to ridicule this person or mock her for being in such miserable condition. I laughed because she has that funny look on her face, that's all. Laughing was just the initial reaction. It was followed by other emotions which are not as good as the first. Reality does bite. Ouch.

Here (New Milford, NJ), when a homeless, crazy, or both, people roam around the residential area, somebody will call the police. Once caught, the deranged destitute will then be turned over to a hospital. There, they will be given food, shelter, recreational activities, and someone to talk to. I should know, my mother works in one hospital where such services are being rendered. Even though in reality, homeless men are to be considered as a burden because a) they don't pay taxes b) they can cause harm at times and c) they are community eyesores, their government creates and implements programs which can help alleviate, if not completely resolve, the problem.

You see, that's the reason I refused to take the civil service exam and become a member of my country's team of government employees. I will puke all over the place and totally hate myself if I ever do that. I am so well versed with the ins and outs of our rotten political system that I can say that Philippine public service is a farce. And no, changing my mind about it or taking back what I just said or having faith whatsoever won't make things right. I am one small voice in a country where oligarchy reigns and people's dignity are bought to be OK about it. Where the middle class work their asses off to put more money in the elite class' bank accounts and some spare changes to their own. I can say a lot more but I am tired. Many Filipinos have already done this; wrote their honest observations just to be tagged as brain-drained sellouts in the end. Can't blame them, though, truth is really hard to swallow.

So, are you still laughing?


About the Job Interview

... ndi ako pumunta kasi malayo daw yun sabi ni mama. hehe.. So I had to send an e-mail containing the explanation for the non-appearance. I got a reply: "Thanks for letting me know."

That only means one thing: I'm still an unproductive citizen. Huhu.

Latest RadioHead Album for $_ _._ _ (It's Up 2 U!)


On Oct. 10, Radiohead, one of the world's most beloved, respected, and unpredictable bands, self-released their first new album in four years. (Capitol had put out their previous six discs.) The rabidly anticipated new album, In Rainbows. When it comes time to pay, you'll encounter four short words that might come as a surprise: ''It's up to you.'' The album's price, that is. Five dollars? Your call. Ten? Sure, sounds good. Nothing at all? Hey, whatever works for you. ''I'm just glad everyone's hearing it at the same time,'' says Radiohead guitarist Jonny Greenwood. ''That was the point, really.'' -- Source

Entire album. Cool band. Legal download. Go for it. Just type 0.00 in the price field and wait for the download link to appear. Don't want to fill up the registration form for the download? Go to the Music section of my Multiply. I'll be uploading all ten tracks from the album. However, I insist you download the album yourself. It feels different because this time, by downloading the file, you are actually supporting the artist. So, if you life Radiohead, visit inrainbows.com now... and as always, ENJOY!


Fall: The Season of Immersion



First they'll turn yellow, then red, and eventually, they'll fall and kiss the ground. Just when you thought you can't possibly reach even just one, they'll let go and surrender to gravity at that time when they are most beautiful. Now that they are gathered on the floor, can you tell which leaf among the thousands fallen you admired last season?

Case File Labo-Labo


The Case of the Wounded Pride

Last night, I lost my soul. It was taken away by a God-like, pretending to be God, entity who seeks to eliminate people with perverted minds. She brought my soul to the court of justice, to punish me for the crimes she described as "contemptible". The judge asked the plaintiff, "Can you describe to me the nature of the crime committed?"

"A disgraceful deed your Honor! A deplorable act that degraded my worth as as person!" Said the woman who, I noticed, seems to be a descendant of Aprhodite as she carries the same endearing features -- beauty, charm, and intelligence. Unfortunately, these characteristics were deemed good-for-nothing as they caused the most destructible and bloodstained era in Greek Mythology -- the Trojan War.

"The exact nature, my dear. Recount to us every detail of the grave misfortune you have suffered in the hands of this wicked creature." The judge stared at me with the look that says "you and deadly crocodiles... together in a cage!"

However, amid the frightening facial expression of the lady judge, I felt that justice is being served regularly in her court. The streaks of silver gray hair were like flowers in full bloom, growing healthy on top of a rich, well-nourished soil. Although she tried to hush them by using a coloring formula, the pigmentless tresses scream of old age and wisdom.

"Persecute her soul, your Honor, give her the heaviest penalty imposed here! Burn her! If that would not be possible, give me the chance to strangle her to death!" There is fire, anger in my accuser's eyes.

"Permission granted if you can convince me of her guilt by presenting me the facts, not your emotions. I don't have another minute to waste, if you can't tell me what happened then I can grant this soul liberty and..."

"She hurt me, your Honor! I'm bleeding to death!"

Suddenly, whispers commenced. and "Innocent, innocence, not guilty..." were the words circulating around the packed court room. Can't blame them, though, the lady who claimed to be damaged by my actions is in perfect shape.

"Appellant, do you happen to know your crime? Only the truth please, as my ears are swollen hearing indictment demands without evidences of culpability."

"I really don't know, but I have an idea"

"What is it then?"

"I hurt her."

The repeated, angry sound of the gavel echoed around the room. As the judge takes off her robe, the witnesses to my trial head to the exit doors.

I am free to go... unless you tell me what it is I have done wrong, between the two of us, I can't be the prisoner.

Sole Solace

People move on or out. They have gone to places -- varied and countless. While many have claimed that we're living in such a small shell, that one may get lost but not for too long, I guess some souls can only get to meet once. And that moment, no matter how wonderful it is, can only last for what it really is -- a moment. Brief yet marks heavily on our minds.

That was my only consolation; whether you like it or not, you'll think of me... and you will remember.